God Defines Me...

Hi, friends! I'm going to be honest--I have been struggling with a lot of things internally lately. I am trying to face some battles that I have been overlooking for a long time. I don't even know that I am ready to share my insecurities--but God has laid it on my heart to write it all out. Praying that someone else will gain some encouragement from it. I will start by saying this--I feel like I am failing sometimes. Okay--more like all the time. I look at other people in my life, and it seems like they have got it all together. It seems like they have "perfect marriages" and tons of people who love them. It seems like they are so "good" when I am so "bad." I look at my husband who I'm sure deserves a better wife. I look at my friends who deserve more encouragement and prayer from me. I look at my God who deserves for me to be focused whole heartedly on Him. The list could go on and on...I just feel like I am nothing sometimes. At least that is what Satan wants me to believe. And I must confess, that even though I may put on a happy, confident face, I sometimes end up believing the lies that Satan is throwing my way. God has REALLY been working on my heart lately--in a big way that has required me to realize that I am full of imperfections, but that I am LOVED by Him. I have been reading a book lately called Sacred Influence: How God Uses Wives to Shape the Souls of their Husbands by Gary Thomas (which I would highly recommend for any wife...) and there is one quote that I have been reflecting on for a couple of weeks now. Thomas says "God, not your marital status or the condition of your marriage, defines your life." Now, I took this quote to another level in my head by saying God, not other people, not my husband, not my family, not my mom and dad, not my friends etc. etc., define my life. God defines my life. It is one of those things that I have always "known"--but I am just now really starting to live by it. For so long I have compared myself to other people, in a way that has always made me feel less and never good enough. But the truth is--the only person that should matter is God. By focusing on that, I have felt more love than ever before. The Lord has formed me and knows every intricate part of me--and the 'ole saying "God doesn't make junk" (although humorous) rings true. By focusing on God's love for me, and worrying less about how I compare to other people, my relationship with Him is becoming deeper and more authentic. He is who is shaping me into the person He wants me to become. I'm ready to just throw everything out and say "It's just you and me, God. Make me who you want me to be." I'm so thankful for a God who loves us no matter what. Sorry this is like a book--but I hope that someone will be encouraged by it Be blessed! Jenn