On Being Content...

For those of you who read, it's no shocker that I have been in a season of waiting for a long time.  Waiting to be a mom.  Waiting for things to "look up".  Waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel.  Always looking ahead, and wanting what seems to be out of my reach.  Wishing away the moments of today, and hoping for what's in front of me.

Yesterday, in my short 10 minute commute to work, it hit me like a ton of bricks.

I have to stop wishing away this season of life. 

I am a planner.  Always have been.  And really, that trait comes in handy with the career I am in.  Always prepared and ready.  Always knowing what is next.  But in life, let's just be real, our plans really never pan out the way we think they will.  I will be 30 in October (AHHHH!), and if my plans would have gone the way I wanted, I would be a stay at home mom with a few kids by now. 

The thing about my plans, is that they were MY plans--not God's plans.  God has obviously planned something very different for me.  Why is it so hard to accept God's plans over my own-when I know that ultimately, His plans are perfect and wonderful, and are much more than I could fathom? 

And as I drove, I began to think--I have to accept this place He has me. And not only accept it, but find the beauty in it.  I have to shift my thinking to the here and now, instead of wishing for the days to come.  Because, really, our days are short.  And every day matters.

So, as I am a month and a few short days from 30--I am accepting that instead of being a mom with my own kids, I am a Kindergarten teacher to 18 of the cutest kids ever.  I am accepting that I am not a stay at home mom and wife, but a working woman who may be a bit of a workaholic and who can rarely keep her house clean.  I am accepting that instead of investing my time into my own children, I get the privilege to invest my time and energy in my students--some of which need me to show them the love of Jesus. 

And not only do I accept this path that God has placed me on, but I am going to start rejoicing in it.  Because I am not worthless--He has given me a spirit of POWER--He has given me an amazing responsibility to LOVE His children, whom He treasures.  He has given me such a passion for working with  kids and a career where He can use me to teach love, compassion, friendship, and grace.  And that really is beautiful, and it really does matter. 

So, here is to being content in this season.  Here is to knowing I have all I need for right now.  Here is to knowing that God is good, and His plans are amazing, even with the hardships that certain seasons may bring.

Be Blessed!